How To Help Your Child Cope With Trauma

A traumatic event is a very stressful incident that causes physical or emotional distress. This type of incident includes such things as surviving a natural disaster, witnessing a violent attack, being assaulted or abused, having a serious accident, or experiencing the death of a loved one.

How can exposure to trauma affect my child?

Past exposure to trauma affects every child differently. Short-term and long-term effects of trauma can vary depending on:

• The type of trauma.
• How long the trauma lasted.
• Your child’s age and maturity level.
• Your child’s home environment and family life.
• Whether your child gets treatment.

In general, exposure to trauma can cause:

• Behavior problems, such as:
  • Angry or violent outbursts.
  • Loss of developmental skills, such as toilet training (regression).
  • Continuing to be very afraid or anxious.
  • Behaving inappropriately in social settings.
  • Frequent crying or screaming.
  • Moodiness or irritability.
  • Lack of confidence.
• Physical problems, such as:
  • Trouble sleeping.
  • Frequent headaches or stomachaches.
  • Changes in appetite.
  • Weight loss.
• Social problems, such as:
  • Fear of being away from parents or caregivers.
  • Fear of being around people who remind the child of the trauma.
  • Trouble trusting other people.
  • Keeping a physical and emotional distance from other people.

What are possible long term effects of exposure to trauma?

It is normal for children to have short-term stress after a trauma, and many children recover without long-term problems. Some children exposed to trauma over a long period of time or to multiple traumas may have long-term problems. For some children, short-term symptoms do not go away, and they may develop post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

Other long-term effects of exposure to trauma may include:

• Being very sensitive to sounds and touch.
• Inability to feel pain or other sensations.
• Long-term health problems.
• Trouble controlling and communicating emotions.
• Learning difficulties.
• Engaging in risky behaviors, such as using alcohol or drugs or engaging in sexual behavior.

Follow these instructions at home:

You can help your child by:

• Being affectionate and loving.
• Giving your child time to accept what has happened.
• Creating a safe family environment.
• Using simple words and explanations to answer your child’s questions.
• Talking together about your child’s feelings.
• Having your child stay involved or get involved in activities that are healthy for your child’s mind and body.
• Planning activities that let your child relax and have fun.
• Creating and following schedules and routines.
• Creating rules for your child and enforcing them. Knowing what to expect can help your child feel safe.
• Creating family traditions.

Your child may also benefit from working with a mental health care provider.

Where to find support:

For more support, consider:

• Talking with your child’s health care provider or a mental health care provider.
• Reaching out to a mental health facility or a community family service facility.
• Joining a support group, either online or in person.

Contact a health care provider if:

• Your child’s symptoms do not go away after a few weeks, or his or her symptoms get worse, including:
  • Irritability.
  • Getting angry quickly.
  • Trouble sleeping.
  • Trouble concentrating.
  • Avoiding people, places, and things that remind your child of the trauma.
  • Inability to feel emotions.
  • Acting overly sexual for his or her age.

Get help right away if:

• Your child expresses thoughts of harming himself or herself or others.

If you ever feel like your child may hurt himself or herself or others, or may have thoughts about taking his or her own life, get help right away. You can go to your nearest emergency department or call:

• Your local emergency services (911 in the U.S.).
• A suicide crisis helpline, such as the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-8255. This is open 24 hours a day.

Summary

• Recovering from exposure to trauma is a process that takes time, and it is different for everyone.
• Having a healthy lifestyle and a safe, supportive family environment can help your child to recover.

Seek Additional Information

Learn more about trauma and children from:

• The National Child Traumatic Stress Network: www.nctsn.org  
• National Institute of Mental Health: www.nimh.nih.gov